


Goodbye

by wallwindow



Category: Kuroko no Basuke | Kuroko's Basketball
Genre: Fluff and Angst, M/M, Sort of a break-up fic, Teikou Era
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-17
Updated: 2015-10-17
Packaged: 2018-04-26 20:05:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,309
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5018602
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wallwindow/pseuds/wallwindow
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Surely I'll meet you again, so thank you for loving me... goodbye..."</p>
            </blockquote>





	Goodbye

**Author's Note:**

> Aaaaaaah I shouldn't be allowed to listen to songs while thinking of NijiAka!!! I ended up doing it again, I wrote a fic out of a song once more aaah. orz Anyway, last week I started listening to L'Arc~en~Ciel songs again, and hearing "Sayounara" immediately made me think of NijiAka, and when I reviewed the English translation of the song, I thought it was the perfect scenario for a NijiAka break-up story or something. So yes, this happened. T_T (The summary is from the lyrics of the song, by the way! Because I'm just really bad at summaries.)
> 
> Disclaimer: "Sayounara" is by L'Arc~en~Ciel, the English translation of the lyrics from [here](http://haruka.baka-koneko.com/lyrics/sayounara.html) (by jchertudi), you can listen to the song [here](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I21HDhBCWW0) for added angst effect as usual.

**Goodbye**  
  
_Spreading its wings, flying towards a small sky_  
_Quietly, a new era has come our way_  
_Riding along the wind_  
_Bringing a farewell with it_

 

Both of them knew that the following school year wouldn’t be the same ever again. Both of them were aware that the so-called “generation of miracles” would only continue to flourish in the following months, and probably years, to come. Both of them had acknowledged that one was destined to lead this new era, while the other one was meant to take a different path, a path faraway… perhaps he had actually started doing so the moment he gave up his _reign_. Both of them had foreseen these things coming, and yet they also came to accept that not one of them could impede the inevitable.

  
_Perhaps, we were pretending not to notice..._  
_We were innocently enjoying ourselves_  
_Knowing that this time would come_

 

Akashi’s heart would secretly do a complete somersault every time Nijimura called out his name as he stood waiting for his senpai outside the Teiko premises. Recently, crossing paths with each other after club activities had become a rare occasion for them since Nijimura had been leaving the school early to take care of his father in the hospital, whereas Akashi would regularly stay in the club room to finish several of his captain tasks. During the days when club activities were cancelled due to various reasons though, Akashi and the former captain would always try to find time to spend together under the excuse of transitioning captain duties before Nijimura completely retires from the club. Though nobody who was well-acquainted with them ever bought this excuse.

 

“What junk food would you like to try today, _obocchan_?” Nijimura smirked sheepishly as he stood next to Akashi near the school gate, and then proceeded to intertwine their fingers together.

 

Ever since the day Nijimura treated Akashi to some meat bun after one of their “captain and vice-captain meetings”, the former seemed to have taken it upon himself to “initiate” Akashi to the art of experiencing and appreciating the rest of the mundane things they could possibly come across, and before Akashi realized it, he had already been spending most of his late afternoons with his then-captain—eating together, walking home together, discussing things together… and as much as Akashi wanted to avoid admitting it to himself, he was undeniably enjoying his senior’s company. He hadn’t had this much fun in years, it was almost overwhelming.

 

Then the next thing he knew, he was verbally informing Nijimura that he admires him and probably likes him more than he should (it was not a confession; he was certain Nijiimura was aware all along). Nijimura only grinned then, flicked his forehead teasingly and replied that the feeling had been mutual, also all along.

 

A few weeks later however, Nijimura resigned from being the team’s captain, suggested for Akashi to take the position, and one by one, the things they had been used to experiencing together halted, much to Akashi’s disappointment.

 

But the redhead told himself he would avoid dwelling on that today as he held onto Nijimura’s larger hand and caressed his knuckles soothingly. At the back of his mind, he thought it would be wonderful if the moment to let go of this hand would never come.

 

“I remember the other day during practice… Nijimura-san was telling me about rainbow _kakigori_?” Akashi answered with a faint chuckle.

 

“Ah, that! Yes! Okay, let’s go! Summer is just around the corner after all!”

 

He let Nijimura lead the way as usual, but each step they take, Akashi understood it also meant walking closer towards _that time_ he wished just wouldn’t come.

 

Summer vacation passed by and brought Nijimura along with it.

 

  
_Show me your smile just once more, don't worry_  
_You're acting so shy today, aren't you?_  
_But I want to go back to those days..._  
_Surely I'll meet you again, so thank you_  
_Until then..._  
_goodbye_

 

Akashi watched as Nijimura playfully hit, one-by-one, Midorima, Kuroko, Murasakibara and Kise’s head with the storage tube for his graduation certificate. If Aomine was around, Akashi figured their senpai would hit his head the hardest. As Nijimura reached Akashi’s spot, the redhead prepared his self for the upcoming impact of the tube on his head, but instead of hitting him, Nijimura grabbed his hand and hurriedly dragged him away from the others. Akashi heard the other second years gasp, but he was certain none of them was surprised.

 

Nijimura stopped his quick steps when they reached the back of the gymnasium, away from the loitering students, but without loosening his grip on Akashi’s smaller hand.

 

He stood right in front of Akashi, his features solemn, his scowl visibly there already, but his cheeks were tainted crimson, slightly resembling the shade of Akashi’s eyes and hair. Akashi’s initial reaction then was to squeeze Nijimura’s hand back, which was warmer today compared to all the previous instances they held each other’s hand. Akashi could feel his own body melting at the touch despite the spring breeze lingering around them.  

 

“Nijimura-san…?”

 

Nijimura opened his mouth, shut it, glanced sideways and then returned his gaze back to Akashi. Each passing second felt like a stab to Akashi’s heart while he stared at Nijimura who didn’t seem to know what exactly to do or say at the moment.

 

But it wasn’t surprising to see Nijimura act this way, after all it had been a while since Nijimura retired from the club and since the two of them last spent uninterrupted time with each other like this. While it was true that Nijimura was often fearless and would openly share his thoughts and emotions, when it came to showing his affections he was mostly clumsy, but Akashi was convinced it was rather charming.

 

Perhaps right now Nijimura was embarrassed… or he was just being awkward.

 

Akashi supposed he was more prepared for this day compared to his senpai, so he tried to form a small smile with his slightly quivering lips and directed it to Nijimura.

 

“Nijimura-san, congratulations on your graduation. Thank you so much for all your hard work until now.”

 

The words came out too formal, it wasn’t what Akashi had in mind to say but Nijimura not saying anything at all at this point prevented him from acting accordingly.

 

His upperclassman swallowed hard (the bob of his Adam's apple caught Akashi’s attention for a split second) and continued to stare at his eyes intensely, making it more difficult for Akashi to maintain his composure.

 

Akashi retried, “Nijimura-san, it’s an eventful day. You have successfully completed middle school. I guess a smile from Nijimura-san wouldn’t hurt? You wouldn’t want my last memory of you in middle school to be your iconic scowl, am I correct?”

 

He didn’t know why, but his statement appeared to have taken Nijimura by surprise, the older guy’s gray orbs widened a bit and the pout on his lips disappeared.

 

After a few seconds, Nijimura sighed, a seemingly deep one, Akashi noted. Still holding Akashi’s hand securely on his own, he finally curled his lips into a smile. It was a bittersweet one though, and it’s something Akashi had never seen before. For some reason, looking at it made Akashi feel as though his chest was repeatedly being pricked with tiny needles. There's just something that seemed very painful in Nijimura's smile.

 

“You’re right, I wouldn’t want my scowling face to be your last memory of me ever.”

 

Hearing those words made Akashi realize at once that today wasn’t just Nijimura’s graduation day, it was the day they would inevitably have to say their farewells.

  
_The floating petals are smiling_  
_Decorating our final kiss!_  
_If we were silent, then I think our tears would start pouring down_  
_So I ask you..._

 

Nijimura debated against himself yesterday night if he should say it, fought with himself until this morning, and when Akashi mentioned “last memory”, he realized once more that the battle had long been lost. There was no point in resisting it now.

 

He watched as Akashi’s seemingly forced display of being fine completely dissipated and turned into a questioning gape.

 

“Later I will be flying to L.A. to follow my family. I don’t know until when we’re supposed to stay there, but I’m sure it’s gonna be pretty long,” Nijimura said, giving his all to not let his voice crack.

 

It hurt Nijimura to see Akashi’s ruby colored eyes glazing slowly (they had literally started to look like precious gems now), the calm composure he had put so much effort into to show off just a few minutes ago evaporating little by little. Akashi wasn’t saying anything, but in the almost two years they had spent together, Nijimura, more or else, had come to familiarize himself with Akashi’s various trains of thoughts.

 

His current train of thought was nowhere to be found.

 

Nijimura took it as his cue to continue, “It was settled some weeks after summer vacation. I wanted to tell you, but I figured you were too busy, I myself was quite busy with the preparations too. And, well… I just couldn’t find the strength and the proper timing to tell you. Then when I made up my mind to actually let you know, the distance between us has already stretched quite far, and I felt as though it didn’t matter anymore if you knew or not, it wouldn’t make a difference anyway.”

 

Initially they tried to make their unlabeled relationship work, but eventually things didn’t go as they wished. But both of them said nothing, because both of them already knew. Although nobody was brave enough to officially put an end to it.

 

Without a word, Akashi’s grip on Nijimura’s hand tightened, and it made Nijimura realize that his ex-vice captain’s knuckles were already turning white.

 

Tears had collected in Akashi’s eyes by the end of Nijimura’s sentences. And it fell down silently, along with the still-blooming cherry blossom petals being blown by the passing wind.

 

Nijimura had never seen Akashi in tears, the current captain was adept, unyielding, absolute.

 

“Oi, oi, your tears are the last thing I wanna see before I leave for the U.S., stupid.”

 

His heart proceeded to break, he wanted to hold Akashi’s face with both hands, but Akashi wasn’t letting go of his right hand. So instead, he placed his graduation certificate in his coat’s pocket, moved his now free hand towards Akashi’s cheek, wiped off the warm liquid staining his beautiful face, and closed the gap between them to place a tender kiss on Akashi’s still trembling lips.

 

Akashi’s lips were thin, smooth, and inviting just as he had imagined they would be, but today they were cold, save for the hot tears that dampened the side of his mouth. Nijimura kissed the stains away, tasted Akashi’s sweetness, tried to memorize the curve of his lips so he could at least imagine kissing them repeatedly no matter how far he moved away.

 

Nijimura regretted that their first kiss had to happen under this circumstance; and he regretted even more that this was most likely their final kiss as well.

 

Akashi at least reciprocated— closed his eyes and opened his mouth to fully accept Nijimura in, and in the meantime, it was all that mattered.

 

Though this made Nijimura’s own tears ultimately trickle down despite his eyes being firmly shut.

  
_Show me your smile just once more, be still_  
_Try and look up at me_  
_When a new season comes_  
_Surely I'll meet you again, so thank you_  
_For loving me..._  
_goodbye_

 

When they broke the kiss Akashi immediately lowered his head, avoided looking at Nijimura’s now also soaked cheeks. Not wanting to let go of his hold on Akashi, Nijimura ducked his head toward his arm to wipe on his sleeve the wetness off his face. He also told himself that it wasn’t right for the two of them to be crying at the same time, at least one of them should be strong enough for this.  

 

Realizing Akashi wasn’t planning on saying anything soon, Nijimura moved his fingers to cup the smaller guy’s chin, titled it upwards so he could meet his gaze one more time. _One last time._

 

“Hey, Akashi…”

 

He then plucked the tiny flowers pinned on his school jacket, tweaked the arrangement a bit so he could place it behind Akashi’s ear.

 

He beamed at Akashi, kindly now, and was simultaneously awed by how his kouhai can be so beautiful despite his flushed cheeks, swollen lips, and wet eyes.

 

When he was assured that Akashi’s full attention was on him again, his shining red eyes fixed on his own, he asked, “I guess a smile from Akashi-sama wouldn’t hurt? You wouldn’t want my last memory of you to be your crying face, am I correct?”

 

Akashi gasped upon hearing Nijimura recycling his previous lines. Nijimura found the reaction cute; he would definitely miss seeing Akashi’s varying fierce and cute facial expressions.

 

Soon, Nijimura witnessed Akashi’s eyes softening. He was quite sure that Akashi was trying his best to summon back his smile for him, therefore when he succeeded, Nijimura buried the image in the deepest part of his mind and heart for safekeeping.

 

“Thank you, Akashi. Thanks for… loving me, and allowing me to love you… I guess.” It required all the mental and emotional strength Nijimura possessed to be able to draw out the words from his lips.

 

To which, Akashi finally responded, “Until we meet again, Nijimura-san.”

 

Nijimura hoped that such day would actually come, he thought it would be nice if by the end of this all, no matter how many years it might take, a new season without an end will eventually start for them.

 

But right now Akashi and Nijimura knew that this was goodbye.

**Author's Note:**

> I wasn't sure what I wanted to achieve here, but I'd be glad if others would read and like it (and any feedback would be appreciated)~ *_* Thank you in advance!
> 
> /Edit: I just really love the idea of Nijimura-san hitting the GOM's head with his graduation certificate's tube, as he mentioned in the Replace novel so I had to include it. ;__;


End file.
